Retiring the JacketS

I have a thing for jackets.
Aside from the simple truth that they keep my huge arms wrapped and out of sight,  jackets for me serves the most practical purpose of pulling a person together.
It may be that pulled together look crisp jackets provide, or the security of providing a private wiggle room to breathe (because good jackets hide insecurities like heavy breakfasts or heavy thighs).
It keeps you warm, and protects you from dust.
If Ally McBeal had her pajamas, I had my jackets.

My two most special pieces are entirely different from each other (in no order, whatsoever).

2005. Graduate School sa NUS. Mahal pa ang kanin noon.

I got my Political Science Forum (TPSF) jacket in 2002, and it's a sort of sports-wind breaker jacket with the hood. It was very memorable, because I remember pretty well how I got it, and the things that were going on that time. I was among one of those 'first' few people who got this black jacket with grey piping (hence the cloth used for you jacket was entirely different from those made later on), and I remember Tere (the now Atty Teresa Bautista), our Board Member, insisting that being officers, we get to have our jackets for free. It was such tumultuous times at the TSPF, because judging by the things our organisation has gone through over the past months-- impeachment proceedings, factions and all this real life political circus, I can't believe we were even able to make it through in our Senior year. Not everyone survived. I remember that time--after receiving my jacket for free (I have to emphasize free goods as fundamentally cherished by college kids like me), an impeachment some people believed I discreetly masterminded, and new found friends within my major-- I felt that I belonged. At last.

Ever since, I've used this jacket to guard me (and my hoochie bags) from rain, from nocturnal insects whenever we decide on road trips in the provinces, and contact from people I don't like (no kidding). It became my comfort blanket for eight years, and it served me well.

Now Im sending it back to Manila, to retire. It served me well, and I'll probably still be using it every now and then, when rain showers grace Ortigas Pasig. But it should be respectfully returned to this very country I grew up in, endured heartaches in, and yet in the end, still love to the core of my soul.

Fres na fres. Yess.

My other favourite jacket was from my ex boyfriend,  Jay. :) He gave me this jacket in 2004, and it's a black cotton zippered number from Esprit. I loved it so much, I still wear it often even if its missing a real zipper slider. I've worn it with literally everything, and was even called JLo while wearing it one time. My sister loved it and asked Kuya Jay to buy one for her. My then-boyfriend had no choice, and dollars poorer later, he was instantly declared as the jacket-supplier.

2008. Wala nang slider yung zipper nyan. waw.

Now, this post is not just about the jacket and their impending retirement. This is also about my sister, Tinay. We were sorting clothes for laundry last week, and when she saw the state of distress of this six-year old jacket I've been wearing, she offered to give  me her jacket since -eherm- it wont fit her anymore. It was a 'Jay' jacket with minimal difference in style. She supplies me everything, actually-- pants, shoes and underwear (I only shop for tops). I was just so glad to have it and it didn't tell that I was touched by her generosity and her way of getting out of her way when she helps other people.

My sister doesn't earn that much when she was back in Manila, and will probably correct me in saying she earns better now. Because that's not so true. But really, I've never met anyone who can give more than what they get, without expecting in return, and just give for the sake of giving. She's not the nicest (haha) person, nor is the easiest to deal with, and this may mean to show that we have our own quirks, strengths and weaknesses.

My sister is the most generous person I've ever known. And I pray, really really pray that the universe take care of her the best way possible, and not to let anyone take advantage of that generous heart. I was lucky enough to have a sister like her. I'm never trading her with any shoes, pants or jackets.

A Chanel bag? Maybe. 

una bien merecida victoria, España

Extended yung game. I've never stayed up this late (or early. and sober) since college years, at nagtutukatok nako ng konti. 

Iniesta's goal was the clincher.

Little Boxes

cover by Regina Spektor (bet you saw that coming. :) )

Little Boxes

Malvina Reynolds

Little boxes on the hillside,
Little boxes made of ticky tacky,
Little boxes on the hillside,
Little boxes all the same.
There's a green one and a pink one
And a blue one and a yellow one,
And they're all made out of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same.

And the people in the houses
All went to the university,
Where they were put in boxes
And they came out all the same,
And there's doctors and lawyers,
And business executives,
And they're all made out of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same.

And they all play on the golf course
And drink their martinis dry,
And they all have pretty children
And the children go to school,
And the children go to summer camp
And then to the university,
Where they are put in boxes
And they come out all the same.

And the boys go into business
And marry and raise a family
In boxes made of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same.
There's a green one and a pink one
And a blue one and a yellow one,
And they're all made out of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same.

Mga tala sa pagluluto (Cooking ng ina mo)

Palagay ko, in our more recent times, may dalawang bagay na uso sa mga Pinoy, under the 'hobby category'. Yun ay ang 'semi-professional kuno' photography at cooking (ay culinary arts pala).

Dati kasi ang ultimate jaforms accessory ay ang telepono. Well thats so 2000. Kasi napalitan na nitong bagay na maitim, mabigat at mejo maasim (ang strap) na tinatawag na DSLRs. Uso na ang photoshoot parties. May mga kilala akong hindi na makakain ng maayos at araw araw, para lang makabili ng lente at flash at kung anu ano pa.

Ngayon, ang 'culinary arts' ang talagang pakay nitong post na ito, kaya hihinto na ako (dearest Lord, ayaw ko ng DSLR. Gusto ko ng Leica. Kahit anong Leica. basta Leica) on grappling with semi-professional photography (aka mediocre, pero okay lang nde naman ako professional eh). (Pektyur: Paella Mixto. Paborito ni Chet)

It's so fluffy Im gonna die

And this my friends, is what's keeping me from jumping on a plane to the land of the Emeratis. Cuteness. I wonder where I can buy one of those. (her name is Agnes, btw. ferpekt.)

Boy-crush alert

oh, he's cute. :D

Updates, updates!

1. To everyone who greeted me on my espeysyal day...maraming salamat po. Salamat din sa Fezbook, at sa mga virtual cakes na pinadala nyo. haha.

2. Im Becky, and Im 28 years old. 

3. Oh gawd, I don't feel like one. Or look like one.

4. When I was younger, people who I associate with such age 'look' the part. They all looked grown up, they seem to have all these grown up issues and problems, they appear more sophisticated.

5. Anyway--so Im not. :) 

6. But that's fine, Im going to Europe anyway.

7. For two years.

8. Yay!

9. All paid for.

10. Yesss....

11. And towards my PhD. :)

12. To study migration and Diaspora.

13. And (hopefully) in the future--sustainable cities, GIS and urban planning.

14. Yeah, those geeky stuff.

15. I think visa problems, sort-of career uncertainty for the husband and family reunification (extended honeymoon) are adult problems. Don't you think? Oh goody. Im an adult.

P.S. Still working on the 'bump'. Been wanting to get one. Badly. Hey-- a post grad student-mommy scenario is most welcome!

And since Im a sucker for ads that play with my emo-ness, here's something I think everyone would enjoy (and it's just part of a series!).

Sometimes you need to go far away to find yourself.

I don't need a taxi.

I don't need them to tell me.

I don't need four years guarantee,

I don't need them to wrap it up for me.

I don't need to sleep, in order to dream.

I don't' need to know where I go.

I need my life to be a journey.

In memory of Agnes

Superwoman.

(Sept 2, 1963- Feb 8, 1991)

Had Rica Agnes in 1982.

Cristine Joy in 1983.

Patrick Henry in 1989.

We love you, Mama.

About fez... (Happy Anniversary Espeysyal)

About Us Section, mula sa aming wedding announcer site.

cos we're keso like dat. eew. :)

Very briefly.

They met one fateful night in 1999, known to Thomasians as the 'Paskuhan'. She was in her early college years in the Faculty of Arts & Letters studying Political Science, while he--well, he's been around for quite some time (hehe).

They're not from the same college (he's from Architecture), and even if they are, the 'time-space continuum, a.k.a. age difference will not allow them to bump into each other on campus (unless of course he does a PhD). While both attended the same school for their pre and primary schooling, even sharing some 'memorable teachers' (the girl, after grade one, moves to Pasig while the boy--bless him, stayed on the looongest time. Yes, a loyalty awardee), it was evident that they wont be seeing eye to eye, unless it is possible for a high school lad to find a kiddo in grade one 'cute and worth pursuing' (personal joke). So you can imagine how their first meeting went. It was a mixture of 'familiarity', contempt (corruption of minors, hala!) and ChowKing Chicharap (the 'menu' for Paskuhan that time). It was talk, talk and talk, with some minor interruptions from her friends which varied from debates about au naturelle hazel eyes, cartwheels and Chicharap. Before they knew it, they were actually sitting on the part of the field 'directly' under the fireworks' close range and had to scramble to their feet to get away, and yes--it was already her curfew.

On their way back to her dormitory, he learns that she's going back to Laguna for the holidays the next day. Being a man of few words (hah), he surprisingly blurts out 'Tara, simbang gabi tayo'. Now, who wouldnt say no to a 'simbang gabi, diba?' she recalls. It was a good, noble cause--waking up very early in the morning to attend mass. So a few hours later they see each other again, while everyone else is either asleep, partying (still), or attending mass. She gets invited to have breakfast at Jollibee Dapitan afterwards, and by the time they'll go on their separate ways, the sun was already up and bright. She goes on her way, while he, on a 'segue' (personal joke, go ask Jay--ohhh...rhymes!).

After few email exchanges during the holidays, his offering to bringing her to 'Glory's', for cheap grocery come school time, and a poem (eherm!) he wrote for her, right after they went on separate ways (for a man with few words!), more emails, dimsum and more groceries--he asks her to be his girl. She stares at him incredulously:

'Neknek mo'.

And so it began.

The Becky

Ze bride is from Santa Rosa Laguna--the land of Enchanted Kingdom, car manufacturers, semi-Tagaytay breeze, hardcore municipal politics, and teenybopper wannabes on TV. She traces her lineage from the two opposite sides of Luzon: Abulug, Cagayan in the North, and San Juan Batangas. (so, she might be bipolar). She's got a degree in Political Science from the University of Santo Tomas and a Masters of Social Science under the ASEAN Graduate Scholarship from the National University of Singapore. She loves to travel, read, write, walk and control. the weather. occasionally. She is currently based in Singapore as a Researcher for the Southeast Asian Studies Programme at the Naitonal University of Singapore.

The Jay

Our groom is your proverbial 'Manila Boy' --or so he thinks. Past neighbors include the bell star dancers and Pipoy, to name a few. His parents are both from the Ilocandia provinces, and he can give you three words in Ilocano on a good day. He has an Architecture degree from the University of Santo Tomas, with part time units from Cora Doloroso to enhance his modelling career*. He likes sports, is naturally athletic** and cooks a (quote)mean(unquote) 'Nilaga'. He looks like someone popular (hint hint) and will shamelessly admit it happens all the time.

The Jay is an Architect based in Singapore.

*paid for by 'Friends of Jay'

**paid for, by Jay

The keso starts here

Una: Ang wedding vows ko nga pala ay impromptu.

Ah yes. Ito ang isang bagay na na-overlook ko, sori naman. Wala kasi kaming wedding coordinator dahil nagpapaka-astig kami (at nagtitipid, at control freak ako, at ayaw ko ng keso, at…). Hindi din naming ginawa yung ‘huwag munang magkita ng isang araw bago ang kasal’ chenes, dahil nag praktis pa kami ng kaunti sa Caleruega ng mga ala-sais ng gabi (na lekat, madilim na pala at nuknukan ng lamig). Hindi lang kami nagsabay kumain ng hapunan, dahil may handaan sa kanilang bahay, samantalang nanlibre ako ng bulalo sa mahogany market para sa aking mga jolalay (read: pinsans at kapatid, pati narin yung gwardya ni Papa na inarkila naming magmaneho for us. Hehe.). Mga alas dos na nang gabi nung matapos kami ni Jay (at nang mga pinsan ko at kapatid) na mag-ribbon ng mga regalo sa ninong at ninang at mag assign ng upuan sa reception. Parang ang paalaman na nga lang naming nung oras na yun ay ‘O, kitakits memya’.

Ngayon, natulog na kami at dahil na-underestimate ko ang lamig (o excited lang talaga ako), hindi ako makatulog. Ang pakiramdam ko ay madaming langgam sa kama na kala ko ay guniguni ko lang, ayun pala ay meron nga, pero hindi marami. Exxag lang ang senses ko. Ala-sais na ng umaga, tahimik ang lahat. Naupo ako sa salas habang nakatingin sa aking traje-de boda (naaks). Parang pasko, pramis. Tahimik, malamig at may kaunting init na nararamdaman ko lang pag sigurado ako sa sarili ko.

Hindi ko na alam ang timing ng mga susunod na pangyayari, pero sa aking palagay ay nag super fast forward ang lahat pagpatak ng alas dose ng tanghali at katatapos ko lang kumain ng bihon na may lechon (hanep sa pre-party lafang, ano?). Syempre late kami. Behind schedule ng mga trenta minutos, kung hindi ako nagkakamali. Ang mister ko, ayon sa post-wedding ‘bull session’ ay nagpaka-‘stage husband’. Kung ang ibang mister ay nagchi-chill nalang ay hinahayaan ang nautusan na magpa-pila ng entourage, sya ang nag-mwestro. Sya din ang namili ng background music para sa paglalakad ng entrahe namin (na nakalimutan ko ding aregluhin, josko). Nangumpisal ako sa pinsan kong pari, winasiwas ako ng magulang ko sa labas na tila ayaw pakawalan (kaya tuloy hindi ako ako nakapaglakad ng mag-isa, demet). Wala na sa akin kung gusto nilang magmaganda at hindi ako bigyan ng ‘me-moment’ (haha), dahil ang iniisip ko nalang nuon ay…

“Nag prepare kaya si Jay ng vows??”.

Dahil napag usapan narin naming yun dati.

Kami ang nagpumilit na dapat may ganong ‘innovation’ (sabi ni Father, yun daw ang tawag dun eh. Parang experiment-sounding.)

Kaso, ang dami kong inasikaso. Ang dami naming pinagkakaabalahan…

Hinatid sa altar, nag mega cry cry yung isang bata,

Nagkaiyakan na ang lahat.

Pag upo namin walang anu-ano... “May vows ka?”

Sabi nya, oo.

Wadapak…

Sabi ko, ay tuloy ba yun?

Sabi nya, “Diba?”

Ayun na nga ba ang sinasabi ko.

So…eto ang sinabi ko, matapos ni Jay sabihin yung sa kanya (na nakasulat pa sa papel na binigay nya sa akin, afterwards. With the Coach bag. Hahaha):

‘Hi Jay. Happy ninth year anniversary. So, ngayon…Wala akong vows na hinanda. I didn’t prepare any vows. (naiyak ako ng konti. Sa kahihiyan siguro) And I’ve never felt so unprepared my whole life. Pero okay lang. May nakapagsabi kasi sa akin na you will never be ‘too’ ready for anything. You can only be ready when you get there. And in front of our God and all these people dear to us—I’m ready.

Jay, I will not promise you a perfect life. I can’t promise you that things will be easy, and that there will never be hard times. What I can promise you is that as long as I live, I will do my best in everything we go through. I will be your muse, your pro-bono consultant, your wealth manager, your bestfriend, your wife and mother to our kids. We will laugh, we will cry, we will live a life and marriage that’s perfect in a way because—it is ours. I promise to take care of you and our family the best way I know of. And I promise to be there for you, to support you and complement you, in everything you do. To be by your side. No one else will travel through the shadows with me,only you. And you alone. (paborito kong linya, hiniram kay Neruda) I love you very much.

The geek in me has urges

"(Subaltern is not).. just a classy word for oppressed, for Other, for somebody who's not getting a piece of the pie....In postcolonial terms, everything that has limited or no access to the cultural imperialism is subaltern - a space of difference. Now who would say that's just the oppressed? The working class is oppressed. It's not subaltern....Many people want to claim subalternity. They are the least interesting and the most dangerous. I mean, just by being a discriminated-against minority on the university campus, they don't need the word ‘subaltern’...They should see what the mechanics of the discrimination are. They're within the hegemonic discourse wanting a piece of the pie and not being allowed, so let them speak, use the hegemonic discourse. They should not call themselves subaltern.”" -Spivak

de Kock, Leon. “Interview With Gayatri Chakravorty Spivak: New Nation Writers Conference in South Africa.” A Review of International English Literature. 23(3) 1992: 29-47

Looking

Im still in the process of finding a monthly planner that best suits me. I've been going around the island, and Im almost resigning to the fact that for 2009, no one working under procurement has humour nor taste. Im on the brink of calling my mother for good old papemelroti, pramis. We're going to orchard tonight, and I'm giving the stationery industry two more days ultimatum. Yesterday's selections were waaay better. Last night a sales lady tried convincing me that calendar notebook planners with more than 12 pages (a thick book.. omaygas) are the rage these days. That, and cross selling those with cute, fluffy characters compensating for the loss of good engrish grammar. Monthly planners are serious business, people! You'll have to stick with them for a year or so. In the first place, I just wanted a calendar that's inside a notebook, with big boxes per day, that's also light and very thin, and soft bound. No springs for me, as they don't really last. Not in my bag.

This is what I had with me for 2009. Imagine how it still manages to surprise me and make me smile.

and being a person with very immature and specific wants...

this is what i want for 2010.

Mega Crush is back.

and he's got two movies to make us happy. haay.

This one comes out on Christmas.

And this... just in time for my birthday (well, next year)

Happy happy joy joy.

Diba nga eh nanalo si Jay sa Jones Soda-LSI (that's Lomographic Society International for you) contest, kung saan ang mala bulldog kong picture ay nakasama sa

winning shots for week one?

After what seemed like eons...

Eto na yung LC-A+ ko. Dumating na sya.

Ang sarap ng libre, naiiyak ako. haha.

omg. look at that grin. kaya ko ni-black and white eh.

Kadiri. Hindi pa bukas ang shutter. hanubah. Skeletor ishdatyou?

Kalahati nung test shots ay ginamit ko para sa kasalang ito.

Ito naman yung ibang non-wedding shots.

In fairness, mahal ko na sya.

04-11 AS2, Kent Ridge

May mga lugar at sulok na feeling mo kabilang ka.

Mas madaling buksan ang pinto, malinis ang banyo na kahit matulog ka sa sahig ay pwede.

Masarap ang umagahan,

tanghalian,

at meryenda (na waffles with nutella).

Kung saan hindi mo kailangang tumakas,

o lumabas.

Walang masasamang espiritu at mangkukulam.

Ikaw ay ikaw.

Wala nang iba.

Malaya kang gawin ang nais mo.

"You had the freedom of the underworld', ika nga nung Earl sa 'Neverwhere'.

Dito sa kwarto na ito.

Dito ako nag plano nang aking kasal.

Dito kumatok si Jay isang umaga bago magtanghali, may dala dalang maliit na box ng cake at isang malaking OX na Uglydoll.

Dito natutulog ang mister ko gamit ang dalawang upuan na pinagdugtong, kapag sinusundo nya ako sa opisina.

Dito nagla-lounge si Janssen, kung saan kakatok nalang siya, at may kasamang bisita.

Dito sa kwarto na ito ako nangarap na maging boss ko, balang araw (hehe).

Dito sa kwarto na ito ako natataranta pag may deadlines,

Naghakot at nagkahon ng mga gamit,

Nagsayaw ng mag isa.

Dito sa kwarto na ito.

Ako nagtrabaho.

At noon--ako'y masaya.

I'll be back, Kent Ridge. :) Magkikita tayo muli.

Hay, John Lloyd

After these past few days' movie marathons with Jay, I therefore conclude that John Lloyd Cruz just replaced Kjwan dude Marc Abaya as my celebrity mega crush. In fairness to Marc Abaya-- he made so easy for me to let go. That episode of him with Maegan Aguilar was a total turn off, malaman man natin ng katotohanan or hindi. Now John Lloyd may not come out so clean after all, pero omaaygas--i rest my case. :)

Kaya pala I continue to wear swatch

Of course we're watching this. :)

Singapore Toy and Comic Convention (pant, pant...ang haba)

Remember last year's toycon with Stella (and AJ who joined in, right then and there)?

This year was Coco's turn.

above: this is a classic 'whodahellareyou??' award

I fear that Coco has a penchant for scruffy looking boxer-wannabes, with 'make shift' X for their navels, most probably in their underpants.

We *heart* you, Mr Monopoly Guy.

attack of the Blythes! The Fairy Sprites (above shelf) scared the hell out of us. hehe. Below are some of the finalists for the Blythe beauty contest held in Tokyo (last year? not sure). hehe.

Coco (finally) meets 'the godmother'. Looking 'maton' and all, Ge texted us his whereabouts when we were on our way to the convention hall: 'Dito ako sa may pink na arko'. Ah, he found the Blythe exhibition. (more of drawn to-- i believe. :) )

This photo op elicited so much laughter in the galleries. The storm trooper is a fan!

A whole area for uglydolls! i may have wet myself. :P

Aha! Bumblebee got the memo. :)

more pictures here.

Hello, Love

translated as:

Matagalnakitanggustokasomahalka. OA.

Hindi ko naman birthday, at wala akong desenteng sweldo ngayon.

I can snub you for all I care, and opt for your cheaper twin.

But it's you I want, demmet.

Must be that red dot.

Nako.

Pag hindi ako nakatiis, kami nalang ni chiquita (see? I even gave her a name)

oh bitterness.

im listing this (Leica dlux 4) down as my xmas wishlist number 1.

rationale: wala pa akong digital camera ever. :(

dlux 3? keri din. M8? pwedeng pwede!

pokpok ako eh. :)

drools. sigh.

Tokyo nga ba? (click pics to see everything)

o diba. these three looked good together.

I haven't found an apt name for her. I think she's Japanese (and for how long have I wanted a Japanese alter ego. hehe), so an English name will not make the cut. Or ewan ko. haha.

Baka Josie, as in Josie Natori that Pinay fashion designer and CEO of the Natori Company. (who kinda looks like her. sort of lang. hehe).

or O-ren Ishii, after my favourite 'Kill Bill' character.

baka I'll end up calling her Tokyo. or Minami Kurihashi (after that place kung saang

kangkungan kami nakarating, one fateful train ride in Tokyo).

Mas masaya pala pag tatlo na sila.

i decided to take a 'stock outfit' photo. AJ and Stella have not worn their stock outfits for the longest time. natuwa ako, parang memory lane chervalin ang dating.

ang kulet nung dinosaur ni manong jay ha. :)